Isn't an agnostic just an atheist without balls?

More Quotes By Stephen Colbert

• God works in mysterious ways but at least he works, he’s never on welfare in a mysterious way.
• If this is going to be a Christian nation that doesn’t help the poor, either we have to...
• Folks, I don’t trust children. They’re here to replace us.
• It would be a very short pint. It would be gummy bears and matzah, and be called Chewy...
• Internet users, that blue screen of death you were looking at this morning? That’s the sky. If you’re...
• Northwestern’s alumni list is truly impressive. This university has graduated best-selling authors, Olympians, presidential candidates, Grammy winners, Peabody...
• This is America. We must defend the principles symbolized by Lady Liberty – unless she’s on the pill,...
• If you love friends, you will serve your friends. If you love community, you will serve your community....
• Don’t cry over spilled milk. By this time tomorrow, it’ll be free yogurt.
• An apple a day keeps anyone away, if you throw it hard enough.
• What does Karl Marx put on his pasta? Communist Manipesto!
• ‎You cannot correct an old person every time they say something offensive. You would never make it through...
• Contrary to what people may say, there’s no upper limit to stupidity.
• Of course! Jeb Bush! America is hungry for another leader from that talented family!
• Hey yogurt, if you’re so cultured, how come I never see you at the opera?