Doctors say it's okay to have sex after a heart attack, provided you close the ambulance door.
- Phyllis Diller
More Quotes By Phyllis Diller
- Oh, that dog! Ever hear of a German Shepherd that bites its nails? Barks with a lisp? You...
- We spend the first twelve months of our children’s lives teaching them to walk and talk and the...
- If you don’t have wrinkles, you haven’t laughed enough.
- Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age – as your beauty fades, so will...
- A smile is a curve that sets everything straight.
- Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
- The reason women don’t play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in...
- Housework can’t kill you, but why take a chance?
- My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor.
- Maybe it’s true that life begins at fifty. But everything else starts to wear out, fall out, or...
- You know you’re old when someone compliments you on your alligator shoes, and you’re barefoot.
- You know you’re old if they have discontinued your blood type.
- My recipe for dealing with anger and frustration: set the kitchen timer for twenty minutes, cry, rant, and...
- In most states you can get a driver’s license when you’re sixteen years old, which made a lot...
- It would seem that something which means poverty, disorder and violence every single day should be avoided entirely,...
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